Memory

I'm flying over Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe in a small plane, only six or so seats.
I am looking down at rainbows and huge torrents of water that fall and rise up into the air again. They call them "the smoke that thunders" and I know exactly why.
It is so hot, so much sun all around the small plane. Elephants arise on the banks of the river, and hippo heads appear and disappear in great number. So much green and so many trees.
The plane swoops and soars and my heart beats fast. So much happiness in the breezes and and this magnificent flight. It was before I met you. And you.
It was another time.
My youth in every movement of that plane.
In every sip of Coke from thick green glass bottles.
The motion of that flight.
A former sister in law, a former friend. The crystal blue clarity of it all.
The tightness of my sun burnt face as it erupts into a series of smiles.
The spray from the Falls on my face.
It was before you came and before you left.
But it was not the wind that time.
Precious territory, my undiscovered self, my fingers and toes skim the surface of the deep pool.
Sometimes, I look up, imagining you are next to me. Delayed intimacy.
I dream tonight of a plate of food that we did not share but that consumed me.
I had not met you.
You were not there.
Safe in my flight I help myself. I embargo the memory.
I savour it like the towel they wrapped around me as I rose from the deep water.
A taxi hailed on a busy West End street.
Tears that will always fill my face with their bitter memory of loss.
Just a building site now...... the fear is gone, as i soar over a great river and the sun catches the reflections in its radiant and generous hands.